July 2009
6 posts
Lauryn Hill - Ex-Factor Video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSQq_mU7jUg
One of my favorite songs from college.
It could all be so simple But you’d rather make it hard Loving you is like a battle And we both end up with scars Tell me, who I have to be To get some reciprocity No one loves you more than me And no one ever will Is this just a silly game That forces you to act this way Forces you to scream my name Then...
Is Instant Messaging Cheating?
So Sarah has been chatting on instant message with this married man, Jeff, and engaging in some flirtatious conversation..nothing physical since they live in different cities.
The wife found the stream of messages on their computer at home and actually emailed Sarah asking her why she was talking to her husband and how Inappropriate it was. Sarah responded to her stating that she knew he was...
Kissing Jessica Stein
You don’t appreciate the chaos and absurdity of life on this planet. You don’t understand irony, or ethnicity, or eccentricity, or poetry, or the simple joy of being a regular at the diner on your block. I love that. You don’t drink coffee or alcohol. You don’t over eat. You don’t cry when you’re alone. You don’t understand sarcasm. You plod through life...
Morrissey - Live in 2002 - I Want the One I Can't...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OFlMI-k9M0A&NR=1
I have seriously witnessed so many pathetic girls who continue to date/hang out with guys that are not available in this town with the “hope” that he will one day choose her as “The One.”
I assume it still remains true that you want the one you cannot have or that is not available.
I thought I would share a little...
Another Bachelorette Contestant Sighting
So yesterday I went to get my hair cut and colored back to brown and saw this handsome guy come into the salon with a motorcycle helmet. I thought he looked pretty familiar, so I kept staring at him trying to figure out how I knew him.
Suddenly I realized that I didn’t know him at all…he was on the last season of The Bachelorette. How in the hell do I keep running into these guys. I...
Peter, Bjorn and John - It Don't Move Me
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SmT1QTCIa9I
June 2009
3 posts
The Bachelorette
http://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/gallery/jake-pavelka-pic/
http://www.hiphopmusic.com/best_of_youtube/2009/06/jake_pavelka_from_the_bachelor.html
A few months ago I was at dinner at Coalvines in Uptown with a friend who was visiting from out of town. We will call her Stephanie. Stephanie and I were enjoying a nice bottle of wine with pizza when I noticed this attractive man a few tables away...
Johnny Hazzard-Deeper Into You
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HVBRRhcwAMo
I was surfing the gay and lesbian itunes list and found this song. I just couldn’t resist the video and had to share it.
Fine Girls/ole miss by Krazy J ft.66 Deuce
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gv0pYk7nBEE
Keeping It Classy at Ole Miss
May 2009
17 posts
Is He Really Married?
I went all the way to Chicago to escape lying men and crazy women to find a perfect story.
Kerry went to the Zebra Lounge to meet her friend who is a bartender who frequents this place in the Viagra Triangle (yes this is a real part of town for those of you who are not familiar with Chicago). Kerry and her girlfriend, Kelly, meet a group of men at the bar as well.
They are jetting off to another...
Hambone! Tribute to Hammy
2005-09-06: Hambone! (Bo-Jangles)
A friend of mine, Dallas, introduced me to a fun “dance.” He calls it Hambone! (bo-jangles). Provided is a short demonstration video of Hambone! (bo-jangles) in action. If any of you are curious the “dancers” are Mike (Dallas’ co-worker and possibly illegitimate love child) on the left, Dallas (Hambone! (bo-jangles)) extraordinaire...
For The Love of STP Tickets
I am in Chicago this weekend and met up with an old friend, Brett, who now lives here of course after I leave. We ate lunch yesterday catching up on stories and discussing our top five live shows we’ve seen which triggered Brett to remember a concert we attended back in the day in Dallas. His guitar teacher was in a band which will remain nameless, so we went to check out the show. One of...
Too Many Dicks On The Dancefloor
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i-EN8dpAvBw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VIM56-0OAUI
A group of us went to see Flight of The Conchords the other night, and this was the opening song. I have nothing funny to say @ this. I just love it.
I have posted the episode from HBO and a live version as well.
Enjoy!
Oops...You May Have Been Caught
Nothing like trying to hit up new places in Dallas, so we can avoid the mushroom clouds that usually occur at the West Village. Last night Lisa, Wes, and Craig all head to The Belmont Hotel to try out the bar and look for possible networking opportunities.
Craig walked by the bar and headed to use the restroom. Before he could even get in the door, he looks at Lisa and says, “We have to...
Paciugo Will Never Be The Same
Alex and Alexis decided to hit up Northpark on Saturday which turned out to be quite wild for a Saturday.
They first arrive at Kona Grill where the bartender points to Alexis and states, “I know what she wants to drink.” Clearly they have been going there way too much. This hillbilly is there with his girlfriend trying to talk to them which is just scary even with an adult beverage....
Mushroom Cloud-Keep Your Enemies Closer
Almost all of my stories seem to revolve around girls only wanting to hear some version of the truth regarding competition. I really never watch television and do not have cable, but I was housesitting and saw the Hills last night. It couldn’t have been more appropriate to what Ive seen lately in Dallas.
Heidi’s scene at the bar confronting the bartender is what we like to refer to as...
Dinner Table Manners
Reef Stash Leather Sandal - Men’s
You and your buddies ran up quite a tab at the bar. They don’t believe you forgot your wallet, so they’re doing a pocket-check. Confirmed—no wallet. What they don’t know is that you have cash in the Reef Men’s Stash Sandals. In case you had the opportunity to buy a hottie a drink, you opened the secret pocket under the footbed of the...
Tangled-Advice for Kevin
Im full of regret For all things that I?ve done and said And I don?t know if it?ll ever be ok to show My face around here Sometimes I wonder if I disappear Would you ever turn your head and look See if Im gone Cause I fear There is nothing left to say to you That you wanna hear That you wanna know I think I should go The things I?ve done are way too shameful There is nothing left to say To you...
Keeping It Classy
I have found so many people in this town to lack class considering this is the only city Ive been screamed at in a bar..which happens at least once a week. Come on. I am not that big of a bitch. People just don’t want to hear the truth. They want to hear some version of the truth to make themselves feel better about the choices and decisions they are making.
So where shall I even begin?...
The Bedazzler
So I am not sure when it became appropriate again to bring out white jeans with rhinestones. Nick has gone out with Kelly a few times. The other evening he starts to comment on her outfit and point blank asks, “Didn’t you wear this the last time we went out? And by the way, did you bedazzle those yourself?”
I thought Nick made up the word, but apparently there is a commercial...
"Hey, It's Me!"
This line may only be funny to me, but I find it quite amusing trying to understand when two people that are dating should start referring to themselves as “Me” when leaving voicemails versus the name. In Dallas it appears that if a girl has slept with a guy, then she goes straight to leaving voicemails saying, “Hey Carl, it’s me!”.
My guy friend was telling me the...
James Arthur Elliott-Sending all my Love to the...
James Arthur ElliottElliott, James Arthur James Arthur Elliott - Born October 23, 1946 in Johnstown, PA. Jim passed away unexpectedly on May 3, 2009. Jim was a loving husband, father, grandfather, brother, son, and friend. He is survived by his wife Linda of 39 years, daughters and sons-in-law, Landice and Alexander Fox; Courtney and Gregory Itson; and Bethany and Stephen Holloway; grandchildren...
Real Name or Stage Name
Friday night I babysat for a few hours and then headed to the Ritz to meet some friends for drinks on the patio. I arrive to find both of them hitting on two gals and enjoying the skyline of Dallas..I just had to say that.
I have two drinks and start to comment that for the first time at the Ritz I have not seen any prostitutes..and yes if you need a hooker, then you normally have come to the...
You're A Thinker
True Story between Girl and Guy from Mexico City in NYC
Kelly went to NYC two weeks ago to visit her exstepmother and hang out with an old friend as well and just get the hell out of Dallas to breathe for a few days. She goes to dinner with her friends and then heads to this hotel bar with a sick view of the city and Jersey across the way..well ok so Jersey ain’t so beautiful.
Jorge...
What Happens When You Leave The Bubble
So last night George and I decide to have dinner and then exit the Bubble to Addison to go and make fun of people…One is always guaranteed a fucking great laugh going to Addison bars.
We head to The Flying Saucer thinking we will be anonymous, but low and behold Geroge runs into a “couple” that he knows. It was just fanfuckingtastic.
The couple will be called Adam and...
Dale Elliott, personable pianist for whom life...
So we are sitting around at Dad’s birthday dinner last Saturday drinking and thinking about all of our lovely experiences together living in Atlanta and Dallas. We were joking around how we used to hit up the 4 Seasons in Atlanta every weekend and celebrate our beloved piano player, Dale. I couldn’t remember his name to save my life, so I decided to just call the 4 Seasons in Atlanta...
April 2009
14 posts
Taco and BeanDip
I just cannot resist this story…A picture would definitely do the story more justice, but I cannot do that to these poor girls.
This story takes us back to The Londoner when the chic was crying and then slept with my friend and disappeared from her own apartment.
My guy friends also met two other chics who we refer to as Taco and BeanDip. These gals are out on a Sunday night at the Mavs...
Craving Normalcy
Guy and Girl who are the best of friends (real dialogue that was said)
Girl: Loving and missing you. Holding Myself
Guy: No way. Tits are fucked. Whoooo I am young and fucked downhill from here. Whoooo.
Girl: I am a fatass and ugly and I have a huge wrinkle in the middle of my forehead.
Guy: Huge Wrinkle. You’re a thinker.
Girl: I’m so intellectual listening to Coldplay and...
Are We Dating OR Hanging Out?
I have lived in Memphis, Dallas, San Francisco, Atlanta, Chicago, and now Dallas and have never really seen such a dilemma with dating regarding if two people are actually Dating or Hanging Out.
I would assume according to these definitions that if you are doing everything in the dating definition and still feel unconscious in your relationship, have no support, and want to kill yourself, then...
Good News
This is now my latest and greatest phrase that is probably used at least 10-12 times a day..Good News..blah blah blah
So where does this come from you may wonder? I was at the Londoner dining with some friends one Sunday evening when Roger and Griffin roll into the bar following their dynamite night at the Mavs game.
Griffin, whom I had met twice, had never spoken to me, so I was confused to...
Gay Town
I had always heard that Dallas had a significant gay population, but I had never ventured to Oak Lawn until 5.5 months ago when a friend took me to the strip.
It was magical and wonderful and a total celebration of a Sunday night with gay men and glitter and dancing until 2am. Low and behold I was smitten.
Last week I returned for the first time to the strip and discovered S4. We hit up the...
The Cookie Lady
So my friend and his family own a restaurant in the city, so we hop in the car to go and check out this mexican joint..along the way I noticed this fabulous cookie shop that I used to hit up while attending SMU and point it out to the guys that we should get some….before I can even finish speaking, I hear Chuck say and I quote, “The cookie lady wants to fuck me. She has pigtails, a...
Is He Cheating?
This is no secret in Dallas..If you are looking for a man (single or married in his 50s) or looking to cheat, then you will be hitting up Al Biernats, Bob’s, or Nick and Sam’s (which apparently is “Bringing Sexy Back” according to the billboard on McKinney).
The hit story of cheating I have heard in the past week is as follows:
Andrea has been seeing this guy for 2 months...
Health Issues-How to keep your man a few more days
I have been hanging out with several guy friends 4 to 5 days a week for the past 2 months since I lost my job and have realized how women are able to keep some of these Dallas guys going…Health Issues.
Play the health card for sympathy, and you can usually gain 5 to 8 days depending upon how long test results take.
My favorite story of the past two weeks is Kelly (name has been changed).
...
The Social House
Where does one begin to describe The Social House located in The West Village of Uptown. The typical Dallas chic with blonde hair, fake nails, and a short dress looking for a “rich” Dallas man to sweep her off her feet and tell her she’s the one.
Instead these girls are going to be fired down on and convinced they are special and magical and…..of course, fuckable. Why else...
School of Seven Bells →
Tyler Durden on modern society →
The Coke Addict
This incident happened two weeks ago, but I am still laughing from my experience at The Black Friar. My friend was visiting from SF, so I wanted to show her the scene of Uptown. This group of guys wanders by our table of four with one of the guys proceeding to just sit down at our table. He is beyond fucked up and laughing and just pointing at his nose. I finally state I think he wants some coke...
Waking Up Alone
One of my favorite stories thus far in Dallas comes to us from the Londoner a few weeks ago. Friend picks up girl from the Mavs game who has just called the police on her friend who then proceeds to run over the security guard’s foot. She arrives at the Londoner crying and pouring out her lame story to me…Bad News. Im a bitch who has no tolerance for crying at the bar. Takeaways from...
